Call Me English

A little corner of the world where I talk about what I want.

FLICS #4: Laundry Night Edition

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Here are five more brief topics that have been bouncing around in my head this week:

  • Why do some people have to be the very first people off of trains? They’ll grab or tackle anyone who gets in their way. Are these the same people at the airport who have tickets in Group 8 but are hovering around the gate when Group 1 is boarding? Sit down.
  • My goodness, the baseball season is much too long. With my dear, beloved hockey coming to a close and the mercury annoyingly sneaking into the eighties (thirties Celsius) even before Memorial Day, I have been trying to get myself in the mood for baseball by watching compilation and pump-up videos on YouTube, and I just can’t do it yet; it’s not the summer!
  • We as a society need to do something about the people who stand out on heavily used sidewalks and ask for a few minutes of your time for what is usually a very good cause. As much as I may believe in the message and in giving to charity in general, I do not respond well to this type of solicitation. I am less likely to give to any organization that uses charity muggers… because that’s what they are.  I just want to get to work or get home or get into the market. Leave me alone.
  • I’m still tickled by the fact that Girl Scout cookies come with wine pairings now. I thought this was a joke when I first heard about it, but it is very real. Does no one else see anything wrong with this hipster nonsense? These are cookies sold by minors for heaven’s sake. And who has wine with cookies? People who have to urgently question priorities.
  • Elevator etiquette seems to have gone out the window. Are elevator rides really long enough that people can’t get off the phone, can’t turn down the music, and can’t avoid breaking wind? Be a person… a non-disgusting person.
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Written by Dave

May 24, 2016 at 23:50

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